Sunday 30 January 2011

The Mechanic (2011) Dir: Simon West

Come on folks, you know what you are going to get with a Jason 'Staffam' Statham movie and, in every regard imaginable, this is no different.
The plot: The Stath plays Arffa' Bishop, a hitman or 'Mechanic' called in by his contacts when a clean hit is essential.
He slips in, does what he needs to do and gets the hell out, leaving a corpse, sure, but a means of death that will ensure suspicions lie elsewhere.
When called upon to take out his long time mentor, Arffa' has to comply and, in so doing, sets in motion a sequence of events that will see him taking his mentor's son under his wing to train him in the art of being a 'Mechanic.'
And it's derivative as hell, with the requisite tit shots, intermittent explosions, gun-play, close quarters fisticuffs and general Uber-male activities that make us mere mortals shrink into our cinema seats in shame. I could actually feel the larger of my testicles shrivelling in embarrassment at all of the manliness on screen, emasculating me more and more with each passing scene so that I was left to shuffle out of the theatre as the credits rolled, shamed to the point of agonised, pitiful tears.
Staffam does what Staffam does, which is fine with us here at Smell the Cult HQ, and Ben Foster is OK as the trainee Mechanic.
It will pass an hour and a half, folks, but it is guff, really.
Average.
Very average.

3 out of 5

The Men Who Stare at Goats (2009) Dir: Grant Heslov

An offbeat, provocative and, at times, damned funny comedy starring Ewan McGregor, George Clooney and Jeff Bridges, the title alone should indicate that you are in for something just that little bit different.
McGregor plays Bob(!) a reporter in Kuwait City investigating a rather humdrum affair, when he stumbles upon Clooney’s Lyn Skip Cassady, a name he heard a while back in connection with rumoured military experiments involving the power of the mind. After some convincing Cassady allows Bob to accompany him as he sets out to prove that Operation Jedi was in fact real and that, far from being a relic of Cold War history, the same paranormal lines of research are very much active.
Phase shifting, telekinesis, mind control, the Dim Mak and more besides are all par for the course when training a Super Soldier.
Witty, engaging and with a stellar cast, this manages that rarest of feats: being a comedy that actually makes you laugh instead of wince with embarrassment with each passing fart joke.
Though quirky, it remains constantly on the right side of the line that, if crossed, leads to the dangerous and wit-free arenas of the zany and the wacky.
McGregor and Clooney have a genuine on screen chemistry, and Bridges is magnificent in the supporting role as the hippy-tastic Drill Sergeant.
Thought provoking, relatively provocative in a ‘poke a stick at the American military’ sort of way, this is quite unlike any other movie I have seen, the nearest comparison I can draw being one of Dean Koontz's more whimsical novels.
If only more comedies were this good.


5 out of 5

Monday 24 January 2011

Black Swan (2010) Dir: Darren Aronofsky

Just back from seeing Darren Aronofsky's latest mental-fest, Black Swan, and I am truly numbed.
It's not often a film renders me exhausted by sensory overload, blunted as I am by years of watching the most excessive, mind-bendingly hideous and depraved movies I can find, but this was a truly draining experience.
The plot: Natalie Portman plats Nina Sayers, a ballet dancer performing in a troupe at the rehearsal stage for an updating of the ever popular Swan Lake. She rehearses keenly, eager to land the role of the Swan Queen. but the director of the show Thomas Leroy (Vincent Cassel) believes that she is only capable of performing The White Swan; virginal, vulnerable and innocent and unable to plumb the psychological depths required to capture the mentality of The Black Swan.
Nina convinces him otherwise when he makes an inappropriate advance on her, biting him and, in so doing, unleashes a previously untapped aspect of her psyche.
As First Night looms, Nina descends into a miasma of horror and fantasy as the blackened spirit now pulsing through her begins to take hold.
Beautifully shot, with a stunning central performance from Portman, this is visceral and primal, posing a simple question to the audience:
Where is the line between obsession and madness?
I am desperately trying to get through this write-up without invoking the name of Dario Argento as it seems too obvious a reference, but it is hard to deny, Aranofsky's cine-literate style clearly harking back to the Giallo-Meister's finer days, but there is more to this than mere homage as the director throws in shades of Cronenberg's body-horror, dashes of Adrian Lyne's Jacob's Ladder, and even the passing thought of Fight Club on occasion.
Whilst 'Oscar nominees' normally have me fleeing to the auditorium with relief once the credits roll, just glad to be out of there to get away from the reeking pretension, the effect here was a mirror image, the movie glueing me to the seat throughout.
Simply magnificent.

5 out of 5

Tuesday 18 January 2011

Gran Torino (2008) Dir: Clint Eastwood

Clint is cool. We all know that.
Clint makes good movies. We all know that too.
Clint has a voice so gravelly, seagulls flock from miles around thinking it’s the sound of ocean waves on a shale beach. We all know that as well.
What we may not have known, however, is that Clint can do a stunning turn as a crotchety old racist, embittered by painful memories of the Korean War, living in a world he no longer truly understands.
The plot: Clint plays the described grouchy old bigot, Walt Kowalski, the last white resident in an all ethnic neighbourhood.
Walt's next door neighbours are Hmong, South East Asians from the mountainous areas of Vietnam, Loas and China and Walt is none too keen on their presence. His mood is not improved when an argument between Thao, the young son next door, and a local gang spills over onto his property, forcing him to draw a gun. Next thing he knows, the Hmong's, through culture, are bringing him gift after gift in gratitude for his bravery and, reluctantly, he takes Thao on as a worker in penance.
Though loathe to admit it, Walt's iciness thaws and, after escalating violence from the gang members towards the Hmong family, he resolves that the only way to improve their lives is to get rid of the gang once and for all.
Laced with biting social commentary and acerbic wit, this is both deeply moving and charged with pointed analysis of modern society.
Clint is simply fantastic as the grizzled old bastard with the classic car fetish, and the storyline builds to a compelling and touchingly inevitable crescendo.
Can't recommend this enough.

5 out of 5
"Get off my lawn!"

Wednesday 12 January 2011

Robocop 2 (1990) Dir: Irvin Kershner

Well, this is a bit of a mess, I'm afraid.
The plot: It's a year since the events of the first movie, and Detroit's police, under the control of OCP, are out on strike over pension troubles.
OCP, keen to build on the success of the Robocop project look to redevelop and introduce a new model into the market, Robocop 2.
Trouble is, all of the prototypes keep on malfunctioning.
One ultra-ambitious female scientist decides that what is needed inside the beast is the mind of a criminal, and what criminal could be better than Cain, ringleader of the notorious Nuke cult, a pseudo-religious criminal organisation that are flooding the streets of Detroit with Nuke, the most potent and addictive narcotic known to man.
Inevitably, with Cain rendered as machine, a showdown with the original Robocop can only be a matter of time.....
For a movie with Robocop in the title, the eponymous character gains very little screen time. Indeed, the character has already become something of a caricature, a fact not helped when he is reprogrammed by OCP and begins to exhibit very odd behaviour.
All of the protagonists are playing their roles with tongue very firmly in cheek, which would be fine if it were even vaguely funny but, unfortunately, it's not.
Gone is the biting satire and ultra-violence of the original, in their place knockabout comedy and elongated shoot-outs.
Lacking the class, invention and, possibly most importantly, the wonderful score of the parent movie, this flounders and flaps and ends up feeling utterly directionless.
A very poor sequel indeed, made all the more disappointing by the fact that the man behind the camera brought the world The Empire Strikes Back.

2 out of 5

Monday 10 January 2011

WALL-E (2008) Dir: Andrew Stanton

Lovely.
Just lovely.
The plot: WALL-E, a rubbish processing robot, lives a lonely, simple life on an abandoned Earth of the future, pottering around collecting up the litter and debris and compacting it into small cubes. One day, a ship descends and from it emerges a new robot, EVE. After some initial confusion and the occasional laser blast, the robots seem to be getting along, right up to the moment EVE is exposed to a small plant, at which point she sticks it in her chest and seems to deactivate.
Confused, WALL-E tries to bring her round, unsuccessfully. Then, suddenly, the ship returns and takes EVE away, but WALL-E manages to clamber aboard, and the race is on to save EVE and discover just what was so important about that small piece of vegetation.
Beautifully animated, this is thoughtful, warm, truly heart-aching stuff.
Normally, when something is considered family friendly and 'life-affirming' (shudder) my bile gland goes into overdrive, but here, it was impossible not to be enchanted.
Incredibly, for a movie aimed at kids primarily, there are very few lines of dialogue, most of the plot development done by visuals alone, be it action scenes or the expressionism of the robot creations themselves.
After being burnt by Toy Story 1 way back when - I HATED that - I have been giving Pixar a wide berth but, with Finding Nemo and now WALL-E, I'm starting to get the feeling my prejudices may have been misplaced and that, far from being pale shadows of the mastery of Hayao 'Princess Mononoke, Spirited Away' Miyazaki, maybe, just maybe, Pixar are worth another look.
Excellent, indeed.

5 out of 5

Sunday 9 January 2011

127 Hours (2010) Dir: Danny Boyle

Following up the Oscar grabbing success of Slumdog Millionaire was always going to be a big ask so, sensibly, Danny Boyle here opted to make a movie that couldn't possibly be more different.
Based on the true story of one man's remarkable stupidity and bravery, this is almost a single actor performance, and a striking one it is too from James 'Son of Green Goblin' Franco.
The plot: Franco plays Aron Ralston, an adrenaline junkie with a real passion for canyoning. Telling no-one, he ventures to a remote part of Utah to attempt to conquer one of its most challenging canyons, but has what can only be described as a serious mishap along the way. Plunging into the canyon, his arm becomes trapped in place by a shifted boulder, impossible to free.
With limited food, a water supply rapidly running out and only one arm in use, we follow his struggled over the next five and a bit days.
Dramatically similar to the fictional Buried, this is remarkable in that it is based entirely on a true story.
Boyle manages to keep the interest surprisingly well, given the close confines and lack of real development, Franco's facial acting alone engaging and diverting.
Whilst one scene in particular is grabbing all of the headlines - the arm hack - there is much more to this than mere build up to a moment of gruel.
With a sumptuous score and phenomenally beautiful cinematography from Enrique Chediak and Anthony Dod Mantle, this is a very good film indeed.

4 out of 5

Saturday 8 January 2011

Monsters (2010) Dir: Gareth Edwards

Quite, quite extraordinary.
The plot: Paris, 2028. A shower of meteorites hits the city one night, striking the ground with unearthly force.
The meteors remain intact, however, though incredibly hot.
As the locals gather, a sound is heard: the scrape of metal against metal and, one by one, the meteors disintegrate, breaking apart from within. From the earthy confines, tentacles emerge, seeking out anyone within range and ensnaring them, pulling them towards the alien menace with savage ease. As the helpless humans near the meteorite wreckage, the wielders of the tentacles are made manifest, gargantuan, multi-eyed beasts with snapping mandibles and heaving flesh......
This could be the plot of Monsters, and it could be a lot of fun.
But it ain't.
Instead, what we have here is effectively a road movie, as two desperate sorts attempt to extricate themselves from Mexico, a country now divided in two - infected and none-infected - to head for America.
The Infected Zone, you see, is now home to extra-terrestrial life, and few dare cross it but, through ill-fortune and desperate circumstance, our hapless heroes must make said crossing.
A movie called Monsters which barely features any monsters should be a cause for disdain, but no, instead this is a cause for riotous praise.
The dynamics between the two leads fires the whole movie and, crucially, the sci-fi backdrop lends an air of apocalyptic dread.
Beautifully shot, magnificently realised on a relatively tiny budget, this is a celebration of all that is excellent about cinema.
Without dropping a single beat, this film should captivate and, simply put, the last ten minutes is so evocative, I felt pretty damn sure my heart would burst. Magnificent.

5 out of 5