Robert Rodriguez's full length version of the Grindhouse trailer by the same name is as testosterone laden as the first day on set of Big Boys in Boots 4.
Danny Trujo plays the titular character, an ex-federale (Mexican FBI, I presume) turned mercenary, hired by a crime organisation to assassinate a politician running for office on the back of an anti-immigration campaign. Betrayed by those that hired him, Machete goes on a violent and bloody killing spree, intent on sinking his vicious blade into the belly of the man at the top.
With a host of semi-cameo appearances, including Don Johnson, Steven Seagal and the woeful Robert de Niro - seriously, this is one of the worst performances I have ever seen from a 'proper' actor - this is something of a fanboys wet dream, Rodriguez clearly pandering to the macho inclinations of his core audience.
With a comic tone, set pretty early on as Machete guts someone then uses the entrails to swing from a window to the storey below, this is also pretty damn violent, gaining the movie an 18 certificate here in the UK, something it is increasingly hard for a film to be labeled with.
Blood gushes, throats are slashed, men are disemboweled, eyes are blasted from their sockets, but it's all done with tongue very firmly in cheek.
If you are looking for a 'real' movie, I'd steer well clear of this, but if excessive gore to the point of black comedy floats your boat, check it out.
Monday 29 November 2010
Sunday 28 November 2010
Unstoppable (2010) Dir: Tony Scott
I approached this movie with mixed emotions.
I love Denzel Washington. His aura, his mannerisms, the way he speaks. He is a real presence in every movie.
I don’t really like Tony Scott's direction. Too stylised, too frenetic, too MT freakin' V.
So would the presence of both on the same movie cancel each other out? Well, it didn't work for me with Man on Fire.
Who would win out?
The actor or the director?
In truth, both do just fine.
The plot: When a railroad operative foolishly steps off the train which he is driving to flip a switch to change the points on the track, he inadvertently sets off a chain of events with potentially epic consequences. The controls are not set properly as he alights the train, moving well below walking speed, so that, between him stepping off and reaching the points switch, the engine is engaged and the train rumbles off, gaining speed all the time. The driver has no chance of getting back on board, so now the game is on: How to stop a half mile long train, pack with a multitude of cargo, including molten phelon, a lethal and highly toxic substance.
Denzel and his new charge Will (Chris 'Kirk' Pine) are the only men in a position to do anything about the projectile but, inevitably, must put their lives at risk to do so.
And it's a great watch.
Super-charged, massively entertaining, this rattles along at a fair old clip, Scott holding his overtly annoying fast-edit predilections in check for the most part.
Denzel is great as always, and Chris Pine does a decent job of matching him blow for blow.
As high concept as it gets, I guess, the fact that it is also based on a true story adds an element of class to proceedings along with the performances of the leads.
Gripping and tense, this is something of a thrill ride.
Very good.
I love Denzel Washington. His aura, his mannerisms, the way he speaks. He is a real presence in every movie.
I don’t really like Tony Scott's direction. Too stylised, too frenetic, too MT freakin' V.
So would the presence of both on the same movie cancel each other out? Well, it didn't work for me with Man on Fire.
Who would win out?
The actor or the director?
In truth, both do just fine.
The plot: When a railroad operative foolishly steps off the train which he is driving to flip a switch to change the points on the track, he inadvertently sets off a chain of events with potentially epic consequences. The controls are not set properly as he alights the train, moving well below walking speed, so that, between him stepping off and reaching the points switch, the engine is engaged and the train rumbles off, gaining speed all the time. The driver has no chance of getting back on board, so now the game is on: How to stop a half mile long train, pack with a multitude of cargo, including molten phelon, a lethal and highly toxic substance.
Denzel and his new charge Will (Chris 'Kirk' Pine) are the only men in a position to do anything about the projectile but, inevitably, must put their lives at risk to do so.
And it's a great watch.
Super-charged, massively entertaining, this rattles along at a fair old clip, Scott holding his overtly annoying fast-edit predilections in check for the most part.
Denzel is great as always, and Chris Pine does a decent job of matching him blow for blow.
As high concept as it gets, I guess, the fact that it is also based on a true story adds an element of class to proceedings along with the performances of the leads.
Gripping and tense, this is something of a thrill ride.
Very good.
Saturday 27 November 2010
Cronos (1993) Dir: Guillermo del Toro
Guillermo del Toro's breakthrough movie is a strange, quietly disturbing affair. The plot: Almost 500 hundred years ago, an alchemist devised a small piece of machinery that promised the gift of eternal life.
In present times (well, 1997) the Cronos device unwittingly falls into the hands of an ageing antiques dealer, Mr. Gris. Playing a board game with his young grand-daughter, suddenly the table is over-run with cockroaches, the source of which a winged, angelic statue Breaking the statue open, Mr. Gris discovers the device, a beautiful and ornate creation, scarab-like in shape and, clutching it in his hand, suddenly the thing sprouts legs, the legs snapping into place against his hand, piercing the flesh. Slowly, a thin, nozzle-like protuberance extends from the head end of the device, this too piercing his flesh. Meanwhile, another seeks the device, a man who will stop at nothing to get his hands on it, for he too seeks the promise of eternal life and, with Ron Perlman acting as his muscle, there's every chance he'll get it, too.
Massively inventive, this shrieks cult classic with almost every frame.
It's sinister, too, the lighting of each scene evocative and disturbing, lending the viewer the need to peer into the shadows that drape the corners of the screen throughout, just in case something truly horrible lurks there.
Imaginative and visually impressive, this is a fine movie indeed.
4 out of 5
In present times (well, 1997) the Cronos device unwittingly falls into the hands of an ageing antiques dealer, Mr. Gris. Playing a board game with his young grand-daughter, suddenly the table is over-run with cockroaches, the source of which a winged, angelic statue Breaking the statue open, Mr. Gris discovers the device, a beautiful and ornate creation, scarab-like in shape and, clutching it in his hand, suddenly the thing sprouts legs, the legs snapping into place against his hand, piercing the flesh. Slowly, a thin, nozzle-like protuberance extends from the head end of the device, this too piercing his flesh. Meanwhile, another seeks the device, a man who will stop at nothing to get his hands on it, for he too seeks the promise of eternal life and, with Ron Perlman acting as his muscle, there's every chance he'll get it, too.
Massively inventive, this shrieks cult classic with almost every frame.
It's sinister, too, the lighting of each scene evocative and disturbing, lending the viewer the need to peer into the shadows that drape the corners of the screen throughout, just in case something truly horrible lurks there.
Imaginative and visually impressive, this is a fine movie indeed.
4 out of 5
Sunday 21 November 2010
Triangle (2009) Dir: Christopher Smith
This neat little Australia / UK collaboration packs quite a punch for it's relatively moderate budget.
The plot: A young single mother, Jess, (Melissa George) goes on a yachting trip with a small group, only one of whom she is acquainted with. All is well until, suddenly, from nowhere, a freak storm capsizes the vessel. Scrambling onto the hull of the vessel, all but one of the group are safe, when a vast ocean liner drifts past. Clambering aboard the huge craft, the group are puzzled to discover that they are all alone on the ship, the crew nowhere to be seen. Jess catches a glimpse of another person, who runs away as soon as they are spotted and, the group giving chase, they find Jess' keys on the floor, in a part of the ship they had not yet visited.
The group divides up, all the better to search the craft, but divided they shall fall, as one poor unfortunate gets a clothes hook through the back of the skull whilst another couple are picked off by a sniper in the gallery of the on board theatre
Why is someone seemingly intent on killing them off?
And why does Jess feel like she's been there before?
The Bermuda Triangle is one of those folk tales that fires the imagination, having just the right combination of science-fiction mystery and potential scientific plausibility to set the mind a-wandering. It's also a potent trigger for this occasionally vicious, continually smart and well-crafted yarn.
Violent in bursts, the lead actress is sufficiently engaging to carry her role and to sweep you along with the intrigue.
Intelligent and, at times, disturbing, this is a solid sci-fi / horror release. Very good, indeed.
4 out of 5
Favourite line: "Downstairs right now is a copy of myself. Me!"
The plot: A young single mother, Jess, (Melissa George) goes on a yachting trip with a small group, only one of whom she is acquainted with. All is well until, suddenly, from nowhere, a freak storm capsizes the vessel. Scrambling onto the hull of the vessel, all but one of the group are safe, when a vast ocean liner drifts past. Clambering aboard the huge craft, the group are puzzled to discover that they are all alone on the ship, the crew nowhere to be seen. Jess catches a glimpse of another person, who runs away as soon as they are spotted and, the group giving chase, they find Jess' keys on the floor, in a part of the ship they had not yet visited.
The group divides up, all the better to search the craft, but divided they shall fall, as one poor unfortunate gets a clothes hook through the back of the skull whilst another couple are picked off by a sniper in the gallery of the on board theatre
Why is someone seemingly intent on killing them off?
And why does Jess feel like she's been there before?
The Bermuda Triangle is one of those folk tales that fires the imagination, having just the right combination of science-fiction mystery and potential scientific plausibility to set the mind a-wandering. It's also a potent trigger for this occasionally vicious, continually smart and well-crafted yarn.
Violent in bursts, the lead actress is sufficiently engaging to carry her role and to sweep you along with the intrigue.
Intelligent and, at times, disturbing, this is a solid sci-fi / horror release. Very good, indeed.
4 out of 5
Favourite line: "Downstairs right now is a copy of myself. Me!"
Tuesday 16 November 2010
There Will Be Blood (2007) Dir: Paul Thomas Anderson
Paul Thomas Anderson's multi-award winning colonial epic is a mixed affair.
The plot: Daniel Day-Lewis, turning in the performance of a lifetime - quite a feat in a career already littered with more 'powerhouse' turns than you can swing an OSCAR at - plays Daniel Plainview, a prospector on the hunt for oil. On a visit with his adopted son to a small town, he learns that a local man believes that there is oil on his property. With difficulty, he convinces the man to give him the rights, and it's not long before the full might of his corporate machinery is in full swing.
But all will not be as easy as he hopes.
Conflict with his adopted son, a run in with the local evangelic nutter and industrial accidents all stand between him and his lucrative find.
Stunning acting and direction should render this a towering epic, to rival even Anderson's own Magnolia in terms of scope and power, but somehow the over-emoting and all too apparent 'award-hunting' get in the way.
Complex it is, but it is also a little too soap opera at times and, frankly, these moments bored me.
Of course, the standout here is Day-Lewis, whose bizarre interpretation of the lead character is both bewitching and irritating. Let's be honest: No-one has ever spoken this way, and no-one has ever had these mannerisms or affectations, but that does not mean it is not engaging and, as a result, it makes for compulsive viewing.
Not the work of genius others would try to persuade you it is, this is actually a touch disappointing from the usually magnificent PTA.
The plot: Daniel Day-Lewis, turning in the performance of a lifetime - quite a feat in a career already littered with more 'powerhouse' turns than you can swing an OSCAR at - plays Daniel Plainview, a prospector on the hunt for oil. On a visit with his adopted son to a small town, he learns that a local man believes that there is oil on his property. With difficulty, he convinces the man to give him the rights, and it's not long before the full might of his corporate machinery is in full swing.
But all will not be as easy as he hopes.
Conflict with his adopted son, a run in with the local evangelic nutter and industrial accidents all stand between him and his lucrative find.
Stunning acting and direction should render this a towering epic, to rival even Anderson's own Magnolia in terms of scope and power, but somehow the over-emoting and all too apparent 'award-hunting' get in the way.
Complex it is, but it is also a little too soap opera at times and, frankly, these moments bored me.
Of course, the standout here is Day-Lewis, whose bizarre interpretation of the lead character is both bewitching and irritating. Let's be honest: No-one has ever spoken this way, and no-one has ever had these mannerisms or affectations, but that does not mean it is not engaging and, as a result, it makes for compulsive viewing.
Not the work of genius others would try to persuade you it is, this is actually a touch disappointing from the usually magnificent PTA.
Sunday 14 November 2010
Skyline (2010) Dir: Colin Strause, Greg Strause
Getting some pretty rough reviews this one, unfairly in my humble one.
The plot: A small group of people are sleeping off a party in a swanky L.A. penthouse, when strange lights beam down from the sky. Anyone who looks at the light becomes transfixed, and can't resist the urge to walk towards it. As their faces alter and eyes transform suddenly they are sucked into the light.
The following day, a fresh menace, as huge spacecraft descend from the heavens, again beaming the strange light, but this time we see thousands of people sucked up through the beam of light into the belly of the beast. What's more, smaller craft break off from the motherships, in search of any humans that may have escaped their light beam and, down on the ground, gigantic monsters roam.
Schlocky, cliched and utterly ridiculous?
Why yes indeed, but it is also riotously entertaining and manages to be pretty damn tense in places too.
Apparently, this was shot for the paltry sum of $10 million, lose change for most sci-fi special effects movies but, for the most part, you really can't see much difference. Sure, the odd bit of overlay looks a bit ropey, but it certainly does nothing to detract from the spectacle.
Managing to be both epic and looming in terms of the visuals, story wise this is stripped right down as, for much of the movie, it is not clear if the rest of the planet is affected, or just the one city, the focus instead on the travails of Our Heroes.
Certainly flawed, certainly a mish-mash of dozens of other movies we've seen before, and they blow it big time in the last five minutes, yet this is still an engagingly enjoyable sci-fi actioner.
The plot: A small group of people are sleeping off a party in a swanky L.A. penthouse, when strange lights beam down from the sky. Anyone who looks at the light becomes transfixed, and can't resist the urge to walk towards it. As their faces alter and eyes transform suddenly they are sucked into the light.
The following day, a fresh menace, as huge spacecraft descend from the heavens, again beaming the strange light, but this time we see thousands of people sucked up through the beam of light into the belly of the beast. What's more, smaller craft break off from the motherships, in search of any humans that may have escaped their light beam and, down on the ground, gigantic monsters roam.
Schlocky, cliched and utterly ridiculous?
Why yes indeed, but it is also riotously entertaining and manages to be pretty damn tense in places too.
Apparently, this was shot for the paltry sum of $10 million, lose change for most sci-fi special effects movies but, for the most part, you really can't see much difference. Sure, the odd bit of overlay looks a bit ropey, but it certainly does nothing to detract from the spectacle.
Managing to be both epic and looming in terms of the visuals, story wise this is stripped right down as, for much of the movie, it is not clear if the rest of the planet is affected, or just the one city, the focus instead on the travails of Our Heroes.
Certainly flawed, certainly a mish-mash of dozens of other movies we've seen before, and they blow it big time in the last five minutes, yet this is still an engagingly enjoyable sci-fi actioner.
Friday 12 November 2010
Feed (2005) Dir: Brett Leonard
Uuuuurrrrgggggh.
That was vile.
The plot: Cyber-cop Alex O'Loughlin from Sydney, Australia, uses the latest technology to track down cyber-criminals, tracing their IP addresses to prosecute them for their crimes. We join him as he and his partner are on the trail of a particularly nasty individual, webmaster and owner of Feederx.com, a website dedicated to streaming apparently live footage of very large ladies being slowly fed to death, though voluntarily, by a tattooed male, whose proclivities include getting them to beg for their food whilst he, erm, rubs himself rather vigorously until his back starts to judder.
O'Loughlin traces the router the traffic is sent from, and pins the location to Ohio, US of A, and it isn't too long before, against the advice of his partner and the express wishes of his boss, he's in an altogether different time-zone, tracking the perverted son of a corn dog down.
So, essentially it's a cop on the trail of bad guy movie, but this is an altogether nastier animal than, say Se7en, the focus here more on the females' willingness to be ritually humiliated.
If Saw and Hostel are torture porn, then this is calorie porn, as the director points a camera lovingly in the direction of the bulky matter the deluded lasses happily chow down upon, some of the concoctions fit to turn the stomach of most rationale creatures.
What makes this movie all the more disturbing is that it is based on a real phenomena, men known as Feeders fattening up emotionally vulnerable women to the point that they become bed-ridden and utterly dependent on the one that did them the harm in the first place. It's the flipside of anorexia, I guess, psychologically speaking, though even more complex an issue.
At times brutal, at times emotional, this is surprisingly well crafted for a low-budget flick, and a low-budget flick from Oz, what's more.
Forgive the pun, but you'll need a strong stomach for this nasty offering and, seriously, you will never look at a burger in the same light again.
4 out of 5
Favourite line: "Consumption Is Evolution"
That was vile.
The plot: Cyber-cop Alex O'Loughlin from Sydney, Australia, uses the latest technology to track down cyber-criminals, tracing their IP addresses to prosecute them for their crimes. We join him as he and his partner are on the trail of a particularly nasty individual, webmaster and owner of Feederx.com, a website dedicated to streaming apparently live footage of very large ladies being slowly fed to death, though voluntarily, by a tattooed male, whose proclivities include getting them to beg for their food whilst he, erm, rubs himself rather vigorously until his back starts to judder.
O'Loughlin traces the router the traffic is sent from, and pins the location to Ohio, US of A, and it isn't too long before, against the advice of his partner and the express wishes of his boss, he's in an altogether different time-zone, tracking the perverted son of a corn dog down.
So, essentially it's a cop on the trail of bad guy movie, but this is an altogether nastier animal than, say Se7en, the focus here more on the females' willingness to be ritually humiliated.
If Saw and Hostel are torture porn, then this is calorie porn, as the director points a camera lovingly in the direction of the bulky matter the deluded lasses happily chow down upon, some of the concoctions fit to turn the stomach of most rationale creatures.
What makes this movie all the more disturbing is that it is based on a real phenomena, men known as Feeders fattening up emotionally vulnerable women to the point that they become bed-ridden and utterly dependent on the one that did them the harm in the first place. It's the flipside of anorexia, I guess, psychologically speaking, though even more complex an issue.
At times brutal, at times emotional, this is surprisingly well crafted for a low-budget flick, and a low-budget flick from Oz, what's more.
Forgive the pun, but you'll need a strong stomach for this nasty offering and, seriously, you will never look at a burger in the same light again.
4 out of 5
Favourite line: "Consumption Is Evolution"
Tuesday 9 November 2010
Stuck (2007) Dir: Stuart Gordon
Got to tell you, I just love Stuart Gordon.
If he'd let me, I'd drizzle him in olive oil, slap him in a frying pan and wolf him down with chorizo.
But he won’t
Whether it's schlock horror gore offerings like Re-Animator or From Beyond or his sci-fi silliness such as Fortress or Robot Jox for me, the man can do no wrong.
Stuck, a neat little exploitation piece that is as devious as it is disturbing, this is both genre-bending and fantastically original.
The plot: After a drink and drug-laced party, a young woman foolishly decides to drive home. Mid-journey, messing with her mobile phone, pissed as a judge on Easter Monday, she hits a man, recently forced onto the street after eviction from his squalid flat. The man strikes the bonnet of the car but, instead of rolling off, plunges headlong through the windscreen, pinned in place by the wipers that are now jabbed firmly into the meat of his matter.
With her hit and run victim suspended, half in and half out of her car, the drunkard must flee for home, then devise a means of ridding herself of her 'problem.'
Morbidly humorous right from the get go, this has a black, black heart, but also a natural wit that carries you through the nonsensical nature of what is actually happening on screen.
Though light on genuine gore, the odd moment of nastiness is graphic enough to make you squirm just a little, and the rapid-fire run time gives this the feel of a genuine cult movie.
Vicious, twisted and something of a morality tale in the end, this is a winner down at Smell the Cult HQ.
4 out of 5
If he'd let me, I'd drizzle him in olive oil, slap him in a frying pan and wolf him down with chorizo.
But he won’t
Whether it's schlock horror gore offerings like Re-Animator or From Beyond or his sci-fi silliness such as Fortress or Robot Jox for me, the man can do no wrong.
Stuck, a neat little exploitation piece that is as devious as it is disturbing, this is both genre-bending and fantastically original.
The plot: After a drink and drug-laced party, a young woman foolishly decides to drive home. Mid-journey, messing with her mobile phone, pissed as a judge on Easter Monday, she hits a man, recently forced onto the street after eviction from his squalid flat. The man strikes the bonnet of the car but, instead of rolling off, plunges headlong through the windscreen, pinned in place by the wipers that are now jabbed firmly into the meat of his matter.
With her hit and run victim suspended, half in and half out of her car, the drunkard must flee for home, then devise a means of ridding herself of her 'problem.'
Morbidly humorous right from the get go, this has a black, black heart, but also a natural wit that carries you through the nonsensical nature of what is actually happening on screen.
Though light on genuine gore, the odd moment of nastiness is graphic enough to make you squirm just a little, and the rapid-fire run time gives this the feel of a genuine cult movie.
Vicious, twisted and something of a morality tale in the end, this is a winner down at Smell the Cult HQ.
4 out of 5
Monday 8 November 2010
Let Me In (2010) Dir: Matt Reeves
In this post-Twilight world, it seems any old vampire story will do.
The bloodsucking Undead are currently enjoying a media-driven prominence that would make Lestat blush, frankly, so it was with some trepidation that I blundered, drunken and only partially clothed, into a mid-afternoon screening of Let me In, the US remake of Sweden's very own Let the Right One In - rated an impressive 8.1/10 on IMDB at time or writing, a movie that, shamefully, I am yet to see.
And boy, was it good.
The plot: A teenager, Owen - played with heart-aching poignancy by the chaffed-lipped Kodi Smit-McPhee - is something of a loner. Picked on at school by big, big bullies, no friends to speak of, he spends his evenings spying, Rear Window style on his neighbours, and playing Rubik's cube in the perishing cold outside. It's 1983, by the way, so the cube is not as anachronistic as it first sounds.
One day, a new family move in; a young girl, Abby - Chloe Moretz, Kick Ass' Hit Girl, no less - and her 'father.' Through desperation rather than genuine desire, they strike up a friendship, two outsiders trapped in a sea of loneliness, but it doesn't take Owen too long to realise there is more to Abby than meets the eye.
She's no ordinary girl, oh no, she's only a freakin' bloodsucking creature of the night.
When Abby's 'father' kills himself somewhat dramatically - skin melts, people, skin more than melts - it is down to Abby to source her own blood, and the violence that follows genuinely chills the blood.
Having not seen the source material - yes, I know, get off my back, I shall be flagellating myself rigorously before the night is out - all I can go on is the current version, and mighty impressive it is too.
You see, this movie manages that rarest of feats, coupling horror with genuine pathos, wringing emotion out of pretty much every scene without once leaving you reaching for the nearest carrier bag to offload the contents of your stomach.
Warm, heart-wrenching, tender and vicious, this is a beautiful little movie that I daresay will vanish from the mainstream cinema's quicker than you can say Deathly Hallows, but here's hoping word of mouth gives it a bit of legs as, honestly, it kicks the absolute arse out of most modern horror.
5 out of 5
The bloodsucking Undead are currently enjoying a media-driven prominence that would make Lestat blush, frankly, so it was with some trepidation that I blundered, drunken and only partially clothed, into a mid-afternoon screening of Let me In, the US remake of Sweden's very own Let the Right One In - rated an impressive 8.1/10 on IMDB at time or writing, a movie that, shamefully, I am yet to see.
And boy, was it good.
The plot: A teenager, Owen - played with heart-aching poignancy by the chaffed-lipped Kodi Smit-McPhee - is something of a loner. Picked on at school by big, big bullies, no friends to speak of, he spends his evenings spying, Rear Window style on his neighbours, and playing Rubik's cube in the perishing cold outside. It's 1983, by the way, so the cube is not as anachronistic as it first sounds.
One day, a new family move in; a young girl, Abby - Chloe Moretz, Kick Ass' Hit Girl, no less - and her 'father.' Through desperation rather than genuine desire, they strike up a friendship, two outsiders trapped in a sea of loneliness, but it doesn't take Owen too long to realise there is more to Abby than meets the eye.
She's no ordinary girl, oh no, she's only a freakin' bloodsucking creature of the night.
When Abby's 'father' kills himself somewhat dramatically - skin melts, people, skin more than melts - it is down to Abby to source her own blood, and the violence that follows genuinely chills the blood.
Having not seen the source material - yes, I know, get off my back, I shall be flagellating myself rigorously before the night is out - all I can go on is the current version, and mighty impressive it is too.
You see, this movie manages that rarest of feats, coupling horror with genuine pathos, wringing emotion out of pretty much every scene without once leaving you reaching for the nearest carrier bag to offload the contents of your stomach.
Warm, heart-wrenching, tender and vicious, this is a beautiful little movie that I daresay will vanish from the mainstream cinema's quicker than you can say Deathly Hallows, but here's hoping word of mouth gives it a bit of legs as, honestly, it kicks the absolute arse out of most modern horror.
5 out of 5
Wednesday 3 November 2010
Westworld (1973) Dir: Michael Crichton
With some films, the concept is far better than the execution and, to a certain extent, this is true of Westworld.
The plot: In the future, a theme park named Delos is divided into three distinct areas; Roman World, Medieval World and Western World - think The Crystal Maze but without the maniacal bald man.....oh....hang on a second.... - each area populated by incredibly life-like robots put in place to create the most realistic, most immersive experience for the well-heeled visitors to the park.
In Medieval World, you can practice your sword fighting, get down to some sexy time with a buxom wench or perhaps indulge in a spot of jousting, all in the certain knowledge that "Nothing can go wrong." Similarly, in Roman World, you can indulge your every debauched desire and in Western World, you can play the part of a bandit, a cowboy, a sheriff.
As the scientists that control the park watch on, every aspect of the robots' behaviour is monitored to ensure the participant's safety until, one day, inevitably, things go horribly wrong, leaving our two main characters trapped in Western World, alone, and stalked by a terrifying gunslinging robot that just happens to look exactly like Yul Brynner.
Yikes!!!
Sounds great, right?
And it is, mainly, once the nightmare scenario kicks in.
The flaws come near the start of the movie, as writer / director Michael 'Jurassic Park' Crichton (he seems to like 'When Theme Parks Attack' concepts) delves perilously close to 'wacky' for the comfort of most sentient beings.
Zany antics aside, once the nastiness kicks in, this is a gripping, massively inventive, genre defying sci-fi yarn that is as tense and gripping as they come.
And any man who claims to watch Brynner without feeling a slight stirring of envy - and perhaps a little more than that - has more fortitude of character than I.
A cult classic, and it's clear to see why, this is well worth sticking with past the vaguely annoying opening thirty minutes or so.
Good stuff.
4 out of 5
The plot: In the future, a theme park named Delos is divided into three distinct areas; Roman World, Medieval World and Western World - think The Crystal Maze but without the maniacal bald man.....oh....hang on a second.... - each area populated by incredibly life-like robots put in place to create the most realistic, most immersive experience for the well-heeled visitors to the park.
In Medieval World, you can practice your sword fighting, get down to some sexy time with a buxom wench or perhaps indulge in a spot of jousting, all in the certain knowledge that "Nothing can go wrong." Similarly, in Roman World, you can indulge your every debauched desire and in Western World, you can play the part of a bandit, a cowboy, a sheriff.
As the scientists that control the park watch on, every aspect of the robots' behaviour is monitored to ensure the participant's safety until, one day, inevitably, things go horribly wrong, leaving our two main characters trapped in Western World, alone, and stalked by a terrifying gunslinging robot that just happens to look exactly like Yul Brynner.
Yikes!!!
Sounds great, right?
And it is, mainly, once the nightmare scenario kicks in.
The flaws come near the start of the movie, as writer / director Michael 'Jurassic Park' Crichton (he seems to like 'When Theme Parks Attack' concepts) delves perilously close to 'wacky' for the comfort of most sentient beings.
Zany antics aside, once the nastiness kicks in, this is a gripping, massively inventive, genre defying sci-fi yarn that is as tense and gripping as they come.
And any man who claims to watch Brynner without feeling a slight stirring of envy - and perhaps a little more than that - has more fortitude of character than I.
A cult classic, and it's clear to see why, this is well worth sticking with past the vaguely annoying opening thirty minutes or so.
Good stuff.
4 out of 5
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