Street Trash (1987) Dir: J. Michael Muro

Some films just scream cult classic.
The plot:
An unscrupulous off licence owner discovers a case of something potent called Viper in his basement and, not really knowing what it is, decides to sell it to the local wino's.
Good idea.
Except for the fact that something in the extra strong brew causes the flesh to slew from the bones in a shower of rampant gore.
With clear social commentary cutting through the madness, this does what good horror should do and sends a message as well as causing disgust.
Whilst the level of production is poor even for low budget offerings, this is clearly because all of the budget was spent on the SFX, and absolutely splendid they are too.
Fans of splatter will be well and truly satisfied by this, as the melting sequences are truly grotesque. Indeed, this is perhaps the most notorious of the bunch of movies loosely brought together under the umbrella term 'melt movies,' though Brian Yuzna's Sociey and Robert Feust's The Devil's Rain are also strong contenders, with honorable mentions for Body Melt and Class of Nuke 'Em High.
As far removed from mainstream horror (the Saws, the God awful Michael Bay produced remakes et al) as it is possible to get, this is one for cult devotees only, and only those with a strong stomach need apply.
Good stuff.

3 out of 5

Moon (2009) Dir: Duncan Jones

Director Duncan Jones' directorial debut is a highly accomplished affair.
The plot:
Sam Bell (played by Sam Rockwell) is a lone astronaut coming to the end of a three year stint on the dark side of the moon, where he is in charge of maintenance and operation of a process shipping a resource back to Earth which helps alleviate the planet's power shortages. With only a few short weeks to go until the ship arrives to take him home, Sam has an accident and awakens to find that it seems he is no longer alone.
And what's more, the new arrival looks exactly like himself......
With a genuine feel of such excellent retro fare as Alien, Silent Running, 2001 and even Blake's 7, this is well steeped in sci-fi conventions.
Jones does a fantastic job of instilling a real sense of claustrophobic paranoia, clearly demonstrating his knowledge of the genre.
Now, an interesting thing: Jones is son of that well known pop / rock / goth sensation David Bowie, the housewives favourite, which would normally irritate, with suspicions of nepotism elevating to positions of stardom and esteem far in excess of the individual's talent, but that is simply not the case here.
A joyously tense slice of quality sci-fi that we have not seen in manies the year.
Loved it.

5 out of 5

The Astronaut's Wife (1999) Dir: Rand Ravich

Science fiction and romance?
Can it possibly be true?
The plot:
Johnny Depp and Charlize Theron play the perfect couple.
She's a primary school teacher with a class full of kids so obedient they may as well be fucking automatons.
He's an astronaut, jetting off on one last mission.
On the mission, he and his astro-buddy have to perform a space-walk and, whilst outside the spacecraft, something happens.
For two minutes, contact is lost.
Upon return to Earth, Depp's character seems OK, but his companion is clearly damaged in some way, and it's not long before he's dead and his wife has committed suicide.
Theron discovers she is pregnant with twins and slowly, slowly, she begins to suspect that whatever came back from space that day was not her husband at all.....
There's a few problems here:
First: Depp and Theron's characters are so puke-inducingly perfect that I found it impossible to feel any form of compassion. Clearly never having suffered a day in their lives, so happy and content did they appear, I felt a period of terror and disquiet would do them good.
Second: The plot is nothing new, though it seems to think it is. Anyone who has seen Ambassadors of Death from classic Doctor Who will certainly know what I mean - "Something came back from Mars" barks Jon Pertwee's Doctor - then there's Lifeforce, Rosemary's Baby (even Theron's hairstyle invokes memory of the Polanski classic), Invaders yadda yadda yadda.
Thirdly: It is cripplingly slow, ponderous to the point of pain. By the time the tension and vague suggestion of something unpleasant does kick in, you've already lost the will to inflate your lungs.
Too sappy and saccharine for proper sci-fi fans, too sci-fi for sap fans, not horrific enough by far for horror fans, this seems to be caught in three minds, and fails to deliver on any of them.
Unnecessarily dull, then.

2 out of 5

Face/Off (1997) Dir: John Woo

Very silly, very noisy action sci-fi guff from Hong Kong's Sultan of Stunts John Woo.
The plot.
Nicolas Cage is Castor Troy, supercriminal, one of the most wanted men on the planet, involved in arms, drugs and terrorism.
John Travolta is Sean Archer, a cop haunted by the death of his son at the hands of Troy, his sole focus catching the child-killing son of a bitch, to the exclusion of all else, including the love of his wife.
We join the action as Archer finally manages to take down Troy, almost killing him, which wouldn't normally be a problem but, thing is, Troy has planted a bomb somewhere in L.A. and only he and his brother know the exact location, and his brother won't cooperate.
Using a new scientific procedure, Archer is able to take the face of Troy - literally take the face right off and stitch it to his own - to infiltrate the prison gang of Troy's brother
All goes well until Troy kills everyone who knows about the swap, leaving Archer in prison with another man's face, and Troy on the outside world, acting as husband to Archer's wife......
It's totally ridiculous, of course, but there is no denying the entertainment factor.
Cage and Travolta seem to be thoroughly enjoying themselves, effectively playing each other, attempting to affect the mannerisms of the other man.
Sure, the plot creaks like an old walrus, but the leads are engaging enough, Cage perfectly suited to the mania driven performance and Travolta is just plain fucking weird anyway, so seems well cast.
The action set pieces are efficiently crafted, as you would expect from Woo, but the movie does suffer from unnecessary length and, had twenty minutes been shaved off in the editing room this would be a genuine action classic.
As it is, damn good fun, but flags towards the conclusion.
Good, though.

3 out of 5

Cars (2006) Dir: John Lasseter, Joe Ranft

Possibly the least highly rated of the Pixar movies?
The plot:
Young, brash, arrogant racing champion Lightning McQueen learns a few life lessons when he becomes lost in Radiator Springs, a town the world seems to have forgotten since a flyover was built. Having caused much damage to the towns' only road, Lightning must stay until everything is fixed and restored, perhaps to the towns' former glory, before returning to the limelight to compete in the biggest race of his life which, if he wins, will claim the much sought after Piston Cup.
Charming, funny, warm-hearted without being saccharine, Pixar have a knack for delivering high quality entertainment.
I must confess, I was a late convert, having seen Toy Story upon initial release and finding it too 'kiddy', the latter Pixar work seems a vast improvement.
With animation that will leave you speechless, this is family entertainment that anyone can enjoy.
Really, really liked it.

4 out of 5

X-Men: First Class (2011) Dir: Matthew Vaughn

Fifth movie outing for the mutant franchise, surely everyone is getting a little bit sick of it all by now?
The plot:
It's 1963 and Charles Xavier, a young Professor at Oxford University, becomes increasingly aware of the flourishing of mutant's in the world, and the potential war that is to come, both between 'normal' people and mutants, and within mutant circles, as lines of dominance are forged.
So it is, against a backdrop of growing hostilities between USA and USSR, which would culminate in the Cuban Missile Crisis with the world on the brink of thermonuclear war, that he forms his school for mutants and, with his first intake of pupils, must ensure a peaceful resolution to the Cuban situation.
Being an origins story, much of the focus here is on establishing just why the characters we are familiar with at a latter point in their chronology behave as they do and, in that, this movie is successful.
Having never read the comics, it is difficult to say how accurate they are in terms of the series mythos, but everything seemed to make sense, fine and dandy like.
Other plus points include Kevin Bacon's creepy turn as Sebastian Shaw, the villain of the piece to begin with, until Magneto steps forward, as well as some cool new mutants, in particular Tron disc throwing Havok.
But it's all a touch dull, in truth.
There's no real sense of urgency or dramatic tension.
We know the mutants are going to survive.
We know Professor X and Magneto are going to come through in the end and we know that, in the final showdown, Professor X will be paralysed.
We know all of that, and the writer's don't really give us anything else to chew on.
Functionality is the key word here.
The direction is functional.
The plotting is functional.
The performances are functional.
Nothing stands out, there's no flair, no surprises, nothing to genuinely excite, which is a real surprise considering the director's last movie was the simply excellent Kick Ass.
Can't say it's rubbish, folks, but it's a little in one ear,out the other.

3 out of 5

Doomsday (2008) Dir: Neil Marshall

What an odd movie.
The plot:
It's 2007, and Scotland is ravaged by a deadly infection that sees the flesh slew off the bones of all infected. Unable to contain the outbreak, the authorities quarantine the entire northern area of the British Isles, effectively cutting the country in two, building a wall in the same spot as Hadrian some two millennia previously to isolate the spreading disease.
Skip forward thirty years, and a fresh outbreak occurs, this time in London. With news revealed to the desperate British Prime Minster that an apparent cure is evident in Scotland, a crack squad of military types are despatched.
Their mission:
Find the scientist known as Kane who, when last known alive, had been working on such a cure and bring him back to England.
The price for failure in the mission?
Banishment to the infected wastelands of Scotland....
A tried and tested plot, really, with echoes of Escape From New York, 28 Days Later, Lifeforce and more besides.
Stylistically, this is pretty confused.
The initial scenes recall the aforementioned Lifeforce but, when the military enter Scotland, we are treated to a quarter of an hour or so of full on Aliens style action, replete with lines lifted straight from the sci-fi horror classic, as well as design that also borrows heavily - the guns, the vehicle etc.
Then things take an altogether bizarre turn, as we focus on the surviving residents of the infected zone, a rowdy band of bloodthirsty cyberpunk types that could have been lifted right off the set of Mad Max.
With an undeniable energy, lashings of gore and a black, black heart, this is a melting pot of genre cliches, all fused together to create something new, something a bit different, and something that is most definitely enjoyable, without being altogether convincing.
The OTT costume designs and wonderfully overplayed performance by Craig Conway as Sol, leader of the Scottish maniacs are a little difficult to swallow but, forget all that and just go along for the ride.
Marshall is an undeniable talent in the genre field, yet to truly put a foot wrong. With Dog Soldiers, The Descent and Centurion also under his belt, he is clearly a director to look out for if visceral, genre-literate cinema sets your fluids in motion.
Flawed, then, but highly entertaining all the same.

4 out of 5