Attack the Block (2011) Dir: Joe Cornish

Joe Cornish's breakaway from his alter ego as half of Adam & Joe is a real step in the right direction.
The plot:
Mysterious meteors rain down upon a council estate in Saarth Lahndan and, after killing an alien life-form midway through mugging a local nurse, a gang of yoofs must fight off what appears to be an invading extra terrestrial force hellbent on their personal destruction.
And it's a great watch.
The trailer and poster campaign made a real play of the links between this movie and Shaun of the Dead, though this is a little wide of the mark as this does not attempt to be overtly humourous in the way that the Rom-Com-Zom classic did, instead going all out for sci-fi horror thrills and spills, and jolly successful it is, too.
The aliens themselves are fantastic, though clearly little more than men in suits (!), with glow in the dark blue teeth that are genuinely disturbing.
Special mention must be made of the cast of 'youths' who, according to the director at least, had no prior acting experience. Though a little lumpen occasionally, for the most part they come across as solid young jobbing actors, so hats off.
With a clear cine-literacy calling back on such creature feature classics as Critters, The Deadly Spawn, The Blob and Cronenberg's Shivers, this is a modern B-movie handled with conviction and a real love of the genre.
Thoroughly enjoyed it.

4 out of 5

Monsters (2010) Dir: Gareth Edwards

Quite, quite extraordinary.
The plot: Paris, 2028. A shower of meteorites hits the city one night, striking the ground with unearthly force.
The meteors remain intact, however, though incredibly hot.
As the locals gather, a sound is heard: the scrape of metal against metal and, one by one, the meteors disintegrate, breaking apart from within. From the earthy confines, tentacles emerge, seeking out anyone within range and ensnaring them, pulling them towards the alien menace with savage ease. As the helpless humans near the meteorite wreckage, the wielders of the tentacles are made manifest, gargantuan, multi-eyed beasts with snapping mandibles and heaving flesh......
This could be the plot of Monsters, and it could be a lot of fun.
But it ain't.
Instead, what we have here is effectively a road movie, as two desperate sorts attempt to extricate themselves from Mexico, a country now divided in two - infected and none-infected - to head for America.
The Infected Zone, you see, is now home to extra-terrestrial life, and few dare cross it but, through ill-fortune and desperate circumstance, our hapless heroes must make said crossing.
A movie called Monsters which barely features any monsters should be a cause for disdain, but no, instead this is a cause for riotous praise.
The dynamics between the two leads fires the whole movie and, crucially, the sci-fi backdrop lends an air of apocalyptic dread.
Beautifully shot, magnificently realised on a relatively tiny budget, this is a celebration of all that is excellent about cinema.
Without dropping a single beat, this film should captivate and, simply put, the last ten minutes is so evocative, I felt pretty damn sure my heart would burst. Magnificent.

5 out of 5

Critters 4 (1992) Dir: Rupert Harvey

Rupert Harvey, erstwhile producer of The Blob, Elm Street 5 and, no surprises, the original Critters movie, here takes up directing duties, delivering a neat, though somewhat schizophrenic monster movie.
The plot: Charlie, have-a-go hero from the first three Critters flicks is on the verge of destroying the final two Crite eggs when a hologram of Bounty Hunter Ug materialises and advises him to leave well alone, else face prosecution for what would effectively be genocide; the knowing extermination of an entire race.
Instead, Ug sends Charlie a transporter, which he uses, but is inadvertently sucked in, leaving him stranded in statis for five decades. When he awakens aboard a salvage vessel, he tries to warn the crew, but the silly bastards won't listen and it is a matter of grim inevitability that they will be picked off one by one by the flesh hungry Critters.
Playing it admirably straight for the most part, this fourth outing for the mouth and fur beasties is entreatingly daft, with low production values and a shaky script, though elevated somewhat by the talent, Brad Dourif in particular; a firm favourite at Smell the Cult HQ.
Not quite a horror, not really playing up the sci-fi, with a notable lack of any genuine bloodshed or nastiness, I suspect this is one example of a budget getting in the way of a director's vision.
Entertaining enough, though.

4 out of 5

Predators (2010) Dir: Nimród Antal

I must confess, I was desperately excited about this movie, as evidenced by my first day of release viewing, something I can rarely be bothered to do, though my anticipation was tempered somewhat by the knowledge that, usually, I have a preference for old over new.
So, would the updating be an effective one?
Oh yes!
The plot: The movie opens in a quite dramatic fashion, with Our Hero Royce (the seemingly omnipresent Adrien Brody, if the trailers that ran before this movie are anything to go by) falling through the sky at great speed, a parachute strapped to his back, but the bloody thing won't open. Inevitably, he survives the fall, and meets up with several others who have befallen a similar fate, the last thing they remember a flash of light, then nothing, before awakening in freefall.
It soon transpires that the motley collection of dubious specimens have been deliberately selected for their specialist skills: a Yakuza, a black ops. mercenary, a guerrilla fighter...you get the picture, though amongst their number, a doctor, who doesn't quite seem to fit the mould.
Puzzled as to what has happened, it's not long before we are right in the action, a pack of alienoid dogs attacking the group, but worse is to follow. Realising that they are not on Earth, but instead on a strange, multi-mooned jungle planet, the band of disreputables soon figure out their purpose for being there: to be hunted.
More action packed than the original, though perhaps lacking a little in terms of atmosphere, there are some genuine standout moments:
The initial alien dog attack; the first glimpses of The Predators; Morpheus's sudden appearance, all bedecked in full on Predator suit, though his presence is more of a cameo, despite his high billing on the posters; the Yakuza guy's Samurai sword fight with a solitary Predator in a moonlit field of knee high grass.
Oh, and don't be fooled as I was. Rodriguez did not direct this movie, simply produced it, camera duties being handled by the marvellously monikered Nimród Antal, the man behind the lens for the pretty decent 2007 motel horror yarn Vacancy.
With The Predator's themselves fleshed out a little more than in either of the previous movies, I was more than a little impressed by this modern slice of sci-fi horror.
Liked it a lot.

4 out of 5.

Clash of the Titans (2010) Dir: Louis Leterrier

Remaking a claymation, stop-motion classic probably seemed like a good idea at the time.
Perseus, son of Zeus, a demigod, born of woman from the seed of a God, witnesses the Gods wrath as his human family is killed by Hades himself. Swearing vengeance on Hades, Perseus joins forces with a legion of soldiers to journey to see three witches, for only they know how to defeat The Kraken, a mighty beast set to be released ten days hence, upon the moment of the eclipse of the sun.
Only one thing will satisfy the Gods, angered by mankind turning their backs on them: the blood of Andromeda as a sacrifice, penance for her mother daring to compare her daughters beauty to that of the Gods themselves.
So far, so plausible.
Along the way, Perseus and his legion encounter giant scorpions, Djinn, flying horses (The Pegasus, it seems, is the name of the species, not the name of just one of the beasts as I had believed) as well as having to head down to The Underworld to tackle that most famous of Gorgon's, Zola...sorry, Medusa.
Bad joke, I know. What's that? What was that? Fuck you, too.
So, essentially a revenge movie with big nasty beasties thrown in.
Sam Worthington is pretty monosyllabic as the hunk of beef leading man, nor do any of the other characters fare any better, the script being lumpen at best.
But you didn't go into Clash of the Titans for the script, now did you?
Did you?
You buffoon.
No, of course you didn't, for this is all about the effects and they are more than serviceable though, even here, there are flaws, with the camera work feeling clumsy and awkward at times so that, occasionally, you don't have the slightest clue what is actually happening. This is especially true of the scorpion fight scene where you have no idea as to the geography of the battle, nor how many of the giant critters they are fighting.
Truthfully, I need to rewatch the original movie as I haven't seen it since I were a bairn but, if memory serves, it was certainly superior to this decidedly average effort.
Disappointing.
Oh, incidentally, I watched the 2D version as I have heard from multiple sources that the retro-fitted 3D is atrocious, not that I can see it anyway with me wonky eyes....

The Abyss (1989) Dir. James Cameron

You know how it is:
You're a successful movie director and have recently completed one of the most accomplished sequels in movie history (Aliens) and, in the back of your mind, an idea is forming about another sequel, one with Arnhult, Asta La Vista and GnR warbling over motorcycle sequences. Trouble is, Linda Hamilton isn't available for a few years and Arnhult has prior commitments up to his nutsac.
What to do?
Well, why not direct an underwater sci-fi spectacular, making use of one of the most expensive and elaborate sets ever designed to whet your appetite for future projects?
Eh?
Eh?
Why not just go and direct The Abyss?
Well?
Beautifully shot, much admiration must be expelled in the general direction of Cinematographer Mikael Salomon for the visuals which truly captivate, right from the off.

The plot: An American nuclear sub' has been lost and it is up to an expedition led by a young looking Ed Harris and the weirdly sexy Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio to seek, locate and extract anything useful, be that people or equipment. A bunch of Navy SEALS are sent along to assist, though they seem to have an agenda all their own whilst, most worryingly, it seems they may not be alone in the depths as something altogether alien stirs.

Whilst this is essentially a monster movie, it is a monster movie with a difference. Here, the gribbly-ibblies aren't befanged and hungry for human flesh, instead they are more cerebral, content simply to float around and look beautiful in a vague attempt to make contact, seeming more curious than threatening.
At times heart-stoppingly evocative, the film does occasionally delve into mawkish territory, particularly the soap opera-light relationship shared by Harris and Mastrantonio, which is the single reason this did not gain top marks.

An excellent, ideas driven sci-fi movie that will, if you have any semblance of humanity in your cold, empty heart leave you simply breathless.

The Mist (2007) Dir. Frank Darabont

Based on a novella by Stephen King first published in the anthology Dark Forces this is, quite simply, an astonishing movie. Directed by Frank Darabont, a man with a clear love of King's output (The Shawshank Redemption and The Green Mile were also adaptations of King's work), this is bleak, thought provoking and challenging movie making.
The plot: A small town in Maine (where else?) suffers a severe thunderstorm, with trees blown down and general chaos wrought. The following day, the locals are packing the supermarket, picking up supplies to clear up the weather borne detritus when a mist rolls into town from the nearby hills, with one man racing into the supermarket, blood dripping from his face, claiming that there is 'something' in the mist. The natives are skeptical, right up to the point when tentacles emerge and snatch one of their own from under their noses. The place is locked down, with stocks piled up against the glass front of the building but, within, a new threat emerges: a vehemently religious woman who claims it is God's vengeance for our impure ways.
Tense, with an atmosphere so sharp you could shave a fourteen year olds scrotum with it, this is less a monster movie and more a focus on the extremes we will go to when pushed.
Several things about this movie stand out and elevate it above standard 'creature feature' status, not least of which are the performances. A cast of relative unknowns deliver excellent, believable portrayals of normal folk in peril, and the heart strings are plucked throughout, though in an intelligent, logical way, not in a 'make's you want to puke out your own kidneys' sense.
Darabont makes fine use of lighting and, crucially, the score is an accompaniment, not the dominant feature, adding substance to scenes rather than overwhelming them, something that the Michael Bay's and Zack Snyder's of this world would do well to note.
It's impossible to talk about this movie without mentioning the ending (I won't ruin it, but skip the next sentence if you'd rather know nothing) which is nothing short of astonishing. Poignant, heart wrenching and with such humanity it brings a tear to the eye, something few, if any, horror movies achieve.
Whilst delivering the goods in terms of gore and violence, this movie is so much more than that and one I would recommend to all, not just the usual sick in the head blood fiends.
You know who you are.