Sick and tired of insipid critics telling you which movies you should and should not watch?
Me too.
Self styled social malcontent and utter hater of his fellow man, Mosefus will guide you in all things cinematic, just so long as there's no period drama or 'worthiness' involved.
Tuesday, 9 August 2011
Goldilocks and the Three Bares (1963) Dir: Herschell Gordon Lewis
Possibly the worst film I've ever seen.
The plot:
There isn’t one.
Well, two spectacularly arrogant and objectionable men, one a nightclub singer, the other a stand-up comedian, begin to date women who spend their spare time at a nudist colony.
We then follow their time at said colony.
Let me be clear about this:
The only reason I even glanced at this was because director Herschell Gordon Lewis was the man that brought the world The Gore Gore Girls, Blood Feast and The Wizard of Gore, films that redefined what was acceptable visually, and movies that any self respecting horror fan must see.
As exploitation credentials go, that's pretty hard to beat.
Here, again pioneering, he attempted to add an element of credibility to the 'nudie-cutie' genre which blossomed in the 60's and, whilst he may have achieved just that, as a viewer nearly 50 years hence, it is barely watchable.
Important only for Gordon Lewis completists, this is one of the very few films I wish I hadn't even bothered hitting the play button for.
Woefully awful, avoid this at all costs.
1 out of 5
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